Chances are high you did not identify yourself as a Tinkerbell if you are interested in reading this blog post. Because “Office Tinkerbells” and “Office Kardashians” are somewhat the opposite.

You know what I’m talking about. This type of woman requires no explanation. We all recognize her; she’s very intense in her tight dresses and high heels. And usually, she shows a lot of skin. She moves and acts as if there were cameras recording every gesture for broadcast to the masses. She’s not living; she’s performing.

Why is it that Kardashians don’t often get promoted?

Because they don’t give anybody a chance to see their brains. Instead, they show everything else. Usually, it’s too much skin, it’s too much make-up, it’s too much jewelry, it’s too much heel, it’s too much of everything except fabric. And because they distract with all those “too much” things, only a few people actually notice that there might be quite an intelligent, creative, reliable, or trustworthy person behind the elaborate façade.

And if they get promoted?

It doesn’t get any easier for them because people still think they “earned” their promotion not because of their excellent leadership, but because of their bodies (that all the other girls would like to have).

My answer to this dilemma? Very simple: make your choice. You cannot have it both ways. If you want to be a sex object, then be a sex object, but don’t get in a snit when people—both men and women—think that’s all you’ve got. And by the way, women can be just as judgmental to other women as men are. In the workplace, your Kardashian bump-and-grind routine will turn off other women, too. But, does that mean you’ll have to dress like a nun or a man? By far not. Just let them see your brain first, your heart, your character, your inside. Give them the chance to see through your clothes, because your clothes do not distract in any way from the inside.

If you want to be known for your inside,
make sure it’s what they actually see and notice first.