When it comes to leadership we all face big challenges. But are they really always the same depending on the gender we are born with? Do men struggle the same way as women do, and do women sometimes struggle with the fact of not being part of the “men’s club”? Possibly it might be the reason that some women choose to pretend to be part of it. Do you know women who act like men? And here is why they shouldn’t:

They are tough, they are strong, they are powerful, and they stand above everything. No emotions, no friends, no partnerships; they just focus on results, results, results. They are part of the imaginary boys’ club, desperate to be accepted as members by the big boys because they play “their game”. It usually implicates long working hours, forsaking oneself for the price of a career. They tend to dress masculine like their supposedly teammates, wear less makeup, usually don’t color their hair, look not approachable, don’t show anything personal or anything that would reveal there is actually a beating heart inside the power suit. She doesn’t want to be kind; in fact, she despises Tinkerbell. She might surround herself with Tinkerbells because they tend to please her, but she would also fire a Tinkerbell in the blink of an eye.

You ask why they don’t get promoted?

Oh, don’t worry—they do. But only to a certain position, to a certain level in the organization. Because what they forget is, that the boys in the boys’ club know exactly how she works. They know they need someone in the hierarchy below them who “fights” on their own authority. They need them exactly where they are and nowhere else—as a partner in crime during every combat. Cold-as-a-fish-women get ahead; don’t worry. But most often they are just used by others who misuse their unemotional focus on results, and who would ever think, maybe because those boys in the boys’ club recognize that leadership is not simply a matter of acting tough.

My answer to this dilemma? Recognize that leadership knows no gender. There are both men and women who are unsuited for top leadership roles because all they know is “my way or the highway.” Keep all the good traits you already have, just make sure you make many friends on your own along the way.

Keep all the good traits you already have. Click To Tweet

At one point in your career (and it’s going to be exactly the point where you don’t get further ahead because your own boss doesn’t want you), you’ll need this network.